Temptation is knocking

Read: Matthew 6:13, 26:41; 1 Corinthians 10:13; Ephesians 6:12-13; 1 Peter 5:8-9;

Everyday you will be faced with temptation. What do you do when temptation is knocking at your door? What do you do when temptation is calling your name? Everyday you are going to have opportunities to fall prey to temptation. What is temptation? Temptation is the desire and opportunity to sin, to fall back into that which you've been free from. You have the choice everyday to turn your back on temptation or to open the door and let it in. So what do you do when temptation knocks on your door?

Well... you get the hammer, wood and nails and you board up the door it's knocking on. Actually just burn down the door it's knocking on. In other words, don't entertain temptation for even a second. The second you go to the door the harder it is to walk away. If you open the door to see whose knocking the chances you will open the door and fall to temptation are extremely high. The Word of God is your greatest tool in overcoming temptation. Here are some ways to overcome.

Go on the offensive - Matthew 6:13 is a prayer for God not to lead you into temptation. If you know you are tempted by something, don't wait for it to come to you. Get rid of it. Go on the offensive and get it out of your life. It's not worth falling time and time again. Be strong and courageous and get rid of it. We are in a spiritual battle, so fight. When Jesus was tempted he used the word of God to overcome temptation. Do the same and you will have victory over that which tempts you.

Don't buy into the lie - The enemy will lie to you and tell you that nobody else struggles with what you struggle with. There is no one to help you and you are the worst person to ever walk the planet. There is a lie that you will never be able to overcome. 1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us that the temptations we face are no different than what others face and God is faithful, he will not allow us to be tempted more than we can stand. Don't believe the lie. Believe the truth... the Word of God!

Accountability - Get someone in your life who can lead you and hold you accountable. This will help you overcome. They can pray for you, encourage you, correct you, show you how to overcome. You need a leader, not a friend, that can hold you accountable in your life. This is so important to overcome temptation. When it knocks on your door they can hold you back from opening it and falling on your face again. Get some accountability in your life.

Temptation is knocking on the door of your life, but you don't have to answer it. Use the word, stand upon the truth and get some accountability and you will have victory over that thing that has held you back for so long. The victory is yours for the taking! When Temptation knocks... knock it out with the Word of God!

Prayer: Lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil. God I will read the word and speak it in the midst of temptation. Help me to be accountable to someone who can lead me out of my sin and into your righteousness.

For more on temptation I posted more on a blog here.

The One

Read: Genesis 2:21-24; Proverbs 18:22, 19:14; Matthew 7:7-8; John 16:24

God has someone for you. Someone special for you. Someone perfect for you and you have a choice. Will I wait for God to bring me the one or will I go out and try and find them? Many people would tell you that you need to date around, test drive a bunch of cars before you know which one you will want. I disagree with this view point and so does the word. God brought Eve to Adam and Rebekah to Isaac. If you will trust God he will bring you the one you will spend your life with. If you choose to wait, and you should, there are some things you need to do to prepare yourself.

Make a list - Seek God and ask him what you need in a mate. Write it down. Hint: being a person full of faith should be number 1. Make a list of what you desire in a future mate and do not settle for anything less. If someone meets half of the list, not good enough. 3/4 not good enough. God will give you the perfect person for you. He will give you what you desire.

Pray - Pray for the person you will be with. Pray that God will keep them and prepare them for you. Pray that God will prepare you for the person. Pray for their destiny and for their life in God. Pray for your future spouse. It will keep you focused on what God has for you and keep you from trying to find someone yourself.

Wait and Serve - God is big enough to bring you the perfect one when you are ready and to keep them for you. You don't have to go out and find them. In fact you shouldn't. If you will stay in the house of God and serve the house of God, he will bring you the perfect one. Adam was fulfilling his purpose when God brought him Eve. Isaac was in the field, this symbolizes serving and God brought him Rebekah. Trust God, wait and serve and God will bring you the perfect one. It happened for me, Adam, and Isaac and it will happen for you.

God has a perfect one for you. Wait for it, it will be worth it! I waited for my wife. I didn't fool around with dating in high school, but served God and he brought me Gia. She is perfect for me and I could not be happier. She was more than worth the wait. In fact at times I cannot believe that I'm married to her. She is my gift from God. You don't know what you want when you are 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, so you really shouldn't be dating. You can however ask God to place a right desire in your life, show you what you need and make a list and pray. Then wait and serve and God will bring you the one for your life!

Prayer: God please bless the person I am supposed to be with. Keep them for me and bring them into my life when the time is right. Prepare me to be the perfect mate for them. Help me to stay focused and wait.

Not all relationships are created equal...

Read: 1 Corinthians 6:14-15, 15:33; Ezra 9:1-2; Amos 3:3.

When it comes to dating as a Christ follower there are specific guidelines that will bring you great success! Just like if you ignore the guidelines for driving a car it will end in pain, disaster and possibly death, if you ignore the guidelines set in the Word of God as to who you should and should not date it will end in great pain, disaster and potentially spiritual death.

Why you date is the most important aspect of dating. It should only be to find a life long mate. Don't date until you are ready to find a mate. It should not be because you are lonely, insecure, and lack confidence, this will end in pain and heart ache as well. Who you date is the second most important aspect of dating. Because you are searching for someone to spend the rest of your life with you better make sure you follow biblical guidelines.

Not all relationships are created equal. In 1 Corinthians 6:14-15 it tells us not to team up with an unbeliever. In other words do not date or marry somebody who doesn't follow Christ. The reason is your outlook on why you date and how you should live will differ drastically and this person will only hinder what God has for you.

"But Pastor Travis I can change them!" Um okay, try this illustration you will need someone to help. Stand on a chair and have a person stand on the ground. Now, hold their hand and try to pull them up onto the chair with that one hand. What happened? Unless you are twice their size and work out everyday you can't do it. Now have them with that one hand try and pull you off the chair. What happened? Unless you chose someone who took it easy on you, you fell. This is what happens when we date someone who is a person of no faith. We try and pull them up to God, but in the end they pull us down. This is why not all relationships are created equal.

Amos 3:3 says how can two walk together unless they agree? The answer they cannot. What happens if you marry someone who is a person of no faith and you are going to tithe. Will they agree... no! What if you want to serve and take vacation to help out with camp, will they agree... no! What about prayer, the word, morality, worship, what kind of media you watch and listen to, how to raise your children, church? In all of these areas there will be arguements and fighting and division and a house divided cannot stand. There will be no unity from the beginning and your relationship will be doomed to fail. Not all relationships are created equal. Date and marry only those who are full of faith, believing what you do.

If you are in a relationship right now and the person you are dating is a person of no faith, you need to break it off right now if you are a student. If you are older and maybe you got saved while dating this person, consider your life since you got saved. Have they been supportive, has there been peace and unity? If not you should probably break it off and decide to only date and marry those who believe what you believe.

Your dating relationship and marriage can be the greatest time of your life or it can end in disaster, all you've got to do to make sure it's the greatest is evaluate why you are dating, who you are dating and live by a standard that sets you apart from the culture.

Prayer: God help me to end any unhealthy relationships and wait for someone who loves you. I will date when I'm ready to get married and date only those who are full of faith in you!

Conduct

Read: 1 Timothy 5:1-2, 4:12; Philippians 1:27.

"conduct yourself worthy of the Good News about Christ..." Philippians 1:27

When we discuss dating and relating to the opposite sex we've got to discuss how we conduct ourselves with them. Conduct is defined in the dictionary as personal behavior or way of acting.

• What is your personal behavior or way of acting with the opposite sex?
  
• Do you see every member of the opposite sex as a potential person to date?
  
• Do you examine each member of the opposite sex and decide for yourself hot or not?

Conduct in dating and relating is this:

• What thoughts go through your mind about the opposite sex?
  
• How and what do you think of them?
  
• If their hot do you think one way if they're not do you think another?
  
• How do you treat the opposite sex?
  
• Are you always flirting and trying to position yourself to be in their mind all the time?
  
• How do you touch the opposite sex?
  
• Could your momma see you do that or would she slap you upside the head?

What is your conduct with the opposite sex? There's the flip side of the above too.

• Do you never talk to the opposite sex?
  
• Do you hide from them?
  
• Are you only friends with the same sex?
  
• Are you only friends with the opposite sex?
  
• If you are are a girl do you only get along with boys and vice versa?
  

Your answers to these questions will determine if your conduct is worthy of the Good News that saved you.

1 Timothy 5:1-2 tells us that we are to treat members of the opposite sex as our brothers or sisters. Our conduct should be to treat them like we would our brother or sister. Now answer these questions:

• Would you think about your brother/sister, touch them, look at them and, talk to them the way you do with the opposite sex?
  

If that "way" is impure absolutely not. So then why are you looking at the opposite sex that way? People say you can look, but you cant touch, but we know from Jesus that looking is the same as touching. Our conduct needs to be holy.

Flip side. Some people go to the other end of the spectrum and have no friends of the opposite sex. As you get older 14, 15, 16 and on it's a good idea to make FRIENDS (no b or g attached to that) with holy members of the opposite sex in groups. This will give you the skills when you are ready to date to talk to a girl or guy. It will help you understand a sliver of how they think and act. Good, holy, healthy friendships with the opposite sex are important.

What is your conduct with the opposite sex? If it hasn't been holy or worthy of the Good News, worthy of a Christ follower, repent and make a decision today that you will treat them as brothers and sisters with all purity!

Prayer: Help me to treat the opposite sex as my brother or sister in Christ!

Awaken

Read: Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4; Ecclesiastes 3:1, 11; 8:6

For everything there is a season, a time for every activity in heaven... Ecclesiastes 3:1. This includes dating. You see many people believe that when you are attracted to someone you should date them. I'm mean it cures loneliness, it gives you someone to give your love and affection to and you feel confident in who you are because of them. This all sounds good right? Well...

The reasons for dating are many and I agree that it does do those things above, but what about God? He should be our cure for loneliness, He should be the one we give our love and affection too and we should find self worth and confidence in Him. Your spouse is the icing on the cake, but your relationship with God is the cake, it is the foundation for your life.

Just because you like someone doesn't mean you need to date them. In fact there is a time for you to date and unless you are ready (your age is right, your finances are right, you are spiritually and emotionally ready) to get married it's not the time. I liked people when I was 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, and 20. Had I followed the patter of attraction = dating I would have had 30 girlfriends by the time I was 20 and had nothing to show for it. In fact I would spent a ton of money, time and had a lot of heartbreak by following that model.

Instead I decided to wait until I was ready. I waited until the time was right. The people I liked when I was1 2, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 and 19 were no where near what I truly wanted or needed. It wasn't until I it was time that God brought my wife to me. Had I dated earlier I might have settled for a person that was not right for me. I would have awoken love before the time was right and would have been swallowed by temptation.

Three different times in Song of Solomon it says, "promise me not to awaken love before the time is right." In other words wait to date until you are ready for a mate. There is a right time to begin dating. If you are stuck in lust, now is not the time to date, but get healed. If you are emotionally a mess, healing time, not dating. If you're under the age of... well too young waiting time not dating time. If your finances are not in order, it's working time, not dating time. If spiritually you are weak it's time to grow in God, not date.

There is a right time to date. How do you know? Ask. Ask your parents, ask a leader/pastor they will tell you. Promise me this; you will not awaken love before it's time. There is a time to date and a time to wait. For many reading this it's time to wait and good things always come to those who wait. I would never have married a woman that is perfect for me had I not waited. When it was time God brought her to me and opened my eyes to see that she was all I ever wanted. Wait to date until you are ready for a mate!

Standards

Read: 1 Thessalonians 4:3-6; Proverbs 1:10, 2:16-22, 4:10-13

"If you stand for nothing you will fall for anything..." Standards. Standards are guidelines we place in our lives that protect us from temptation. They do not keep us from fun, but rather keep us from harm, so we can enjoy life to the fullest.

When it comes to relating with and dating the opposite sex we have to set standards. These standards will make sure we are protected from temptation and will provide the path to follow towards the ultimate relationship.

The bible outlines clearly what is sin in relationships. 1 Thessalonians 4:3 says to stay away from sexual sin. Jesus said in Matthew 5:27 that if you look at a woman with lust you've committed adultery with her. So we know that premarital sex, looking with lust and touching someone inappropriately are wrong. That's already been established, but we need standards in our lives that will keep us far from that place.

Standards are something you set before your dating in your personal life and when you start dating with your new acquired bf or gf. Before your start dating you need to take some time and establish standards for your life. It would be a good idea to ask your parents or a leader what they should be. I will list some suggestions that will protect, but you must decide for yourself. Here they are:

• I'm not going to date until I'm old enough to get married... - a lot of people get themselves into trouble dating too early. Don't date till you're ready for a mate!
• I'm going to be careful what I put before my eyes. I'm not going to watch shows, get on Internet sites or look at the opposite sex in a way that will cause me to lust.
• I'm not going to be alone with a member of the opposite sex that isn't my family.
• I'm not going to buy into the cultures idea of what a dating relationship looks like, but choose purity for my life.
• I'm going to pray for my future spouse. Asking God to protect and keep them for me.
• I'm going to keep and protect myself for them.

When you are of age to date and when you begin you need to establish standards, then go to your parents or a leader you trust and let them know what your standards are. Give them permission to add to your standards and check in with you on a regular basis to make sure you are doing well. Here are some suggestions for standards in dating:

• Don't be alone in one another's room, house, couch etc... Temptation comes when nobody is around.
• Have a curfew. I.e. we won't be alone after 11pm. When your tired and late at night is when many people give in to temptation.
• Establish boundaries in physical touching. Not just we will not have sex until we are married, but we wont kiss, or we will kiss but only like this. Making out, physical touch and such will lead to temptation and you want to avoid temptation.
• Environments. Be careful what environments you put yourself in. Couches, beds, romantic fires in the middle of the woods, the back seat of your car looking at the stars can all lead to sin. Be careful, there will be plenty of time for that when you are married!
• Be transparent. Make a choice that if you do fall to temptation that you will go quickly and confess it, so you can be healed and it doesn't l
• Lead to more. One little slip not confessed can lead to big falls that create lots of pain.

These are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to standards. You need them in your life now and when you date because if you stand for nothing you will fall for anything. God has such an incredible spouse for you and marriage don't ruin it by falling into temptation! Set some standards and have someone in authority hold you accountable.

Relating and Dating Reading Plan

Relating and Dating

Monday: Standards. Read: 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8; Proverbs 1:10, 2:16-22, 4:10-13

Prayer: God I choose biblical standards for relating and dating the opposite sex. I commit to lay those standards out with someone who can hold me accountable when I date.

Tuesday: Awaken. Read: Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4; Ecclesiastes 3:1, 11; 8:6

Prayer: God help not to do anything that would cause me to burn for more. Also if I have awoken love before its time help me to put it to sleep.

Wednesday: Conduct. Read: 1 Timothy 5:1-2, 4:12; Philippians 1:27;

Prayer: Help me to treat the opposite sex as my brother or sister in Christ!

Thursday: Not all relationships are created equal. Read: 1 Corinthians 6:14-15, 15:33; Ezra 9:1-2; Amos 3:3.

Prayer: Help me to end any unhealthy relationships and wait for someone for you!

Friday: Sexual purity. Read: Colossians 3:5; Ephesians 4:17-19; 1 Timothy 2:22; 1 Thessalonians 5:22; Psalm 119:9; 1 Corinthians 6:18.

Prayer: I want to walk in purity. Help me to get rid of anything that doesn’t glorify you.

Saturday: Temptation is knocking. Read: Matthew 6:13, 26:41; 1 Corinthians 10:13; Ephesians 6:12-13; 1 Peter 5:8-9;

Prayer: Lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil.

Sunday: The ONE! Read: Genesis 2:21-24; Proverbs 18:22, 19:14; Matthew 7:7-8; John 16:24

Prayer: God bring bless the person I am supposed to be with. Keep them for me and bring them into my life when the time is right.

GRID Tonight!

We have our weekly youth service tonight and I am preaching a message titled Purity, what it is... Today also marks my two year anniversary of becoming a full time youth pastor. It has been an incredible two years and I'll try and post something about the two things I've learned in two years this weekend some time. I've learned more than two, but to keep it short I'll pick the two biggest and run with it.

Also I was up all last night sick with the same crud my wife had, but I'm feeling a little better today and will be ready to preach come 8pm!

Possessed by Purity

We are all possessed! You're possessed, I'm possessed, your momma is possessed, your daddy is possessed, everyone of us is possessed.

Dictionary.com defines the word possessed as:

1. To have as property; own.
2. To have as a quality, characteristic, or other attribute: possessed great tact.
3. To acquire mastery of or have knowledge of: possess valuable data.
To gain or exert influence or control over; dominate: Fury possessed me.
To control or maintain (one's nature) in a particular condition: I possessed my
temper despite the insult.

4. To cause to own, hold, or master something, such as property or knowledge.
5. To cause to be influenced or controlled, as by an idea or emotion.

We are all possessed by either the flesh or the Father. Either our flesh has property and ownership, it gains or exerts influence or control over our lives and dominates us, or the Father does.

If we are possessed (owned) by the flesh we will fulfill or walk according to the lust of our flesh (Gal 5:16).

If we are possessed (owned) by the Father we will fulfill or walk according to the spirit (Gal 5:16)

It's our choice to be owned by the flesh or the father. Look to Psalm 51:10 for a prayer to begin the shift from flesh to father. (It's not a bad idea to pray the whole thing over your life either.)

To maintain this ownership of the Father pray Psalm 139:23 over your life. Pray these prayers and watch your life become possessed by purity!