The one thing I don't have time for is those that are unwilling to change. Every once and awhile someone will cross my path that knows all the right words to say, the emotions to show and is really only playing a game. They don't want to change, they just want to take up my time and I don't have time for it.
I love these people, pray for them and want to help them, but I don't have time for them because there are tons of others who want to change and could use my help. When I'm with someone who doesn't want change it steals from someone who does.
Make sure you are helping those who want to change. Love and pray for the ones who don't want change, but don't spend a lot of time with them. Go to those who really want change and connect them to Life.
How to tell if someone wants change:
- They ask for it - People who come to you and ask for help to change are serious, as long as the demonstrate the other points. Someone may say, "I need to talk to you," or "Will you please talk to so and so." This may or may not mean they want change. In the first few minutes of the conversation ask them simply, would you like to change? If it's a yes, move forward, if it's a no, end the conversation politely and pray for that person.
- They mention it - They may come to you and ask to talk, but someone who wants change will mention what they are going through and how they want to change. They will say things like. "I'm so tired of..., I can't stand it any more...," They will make statements that imply a desire to change. It's in their conversation, they mention it.
- They demonstrate it - People who want to change show a willingness to do so by demonstrating change in their life. This doesn't mean they will be perfect, but they make an effort to change. It is demonstrated by their actions.
- They pay for it - And I don't mean financially. When it gets really tough, they keep on pushing. When they feel like they can't make it they pay the price to continue. They give up things and they make decisions that cost them. Hard decisions that bring real change. People who want change pay the price of quality decisions to get change.
1 comment:
Excellent post PT.
I am writing this today because I had some serious breakthrough last night on my situation with my son. I also have to say I am so sorry Jon and Heidi because I have been trying in every way to hold onto my son,as my son.I am good at exhorting anyone it would seem, except my son. For that I am horribly sorry. I felt that I wanted my son to still need me and was willing to do just about anything to make that so.I learned last night that I have to let go. I have read thousands of times, or so it seems, how a man marries and leaves his parents,and well I thought thats fine for everyone else but me.I was served up a bit of humble pie last night through my hubby being used of the Lord,and I am so thankful to God for this final and victorious breakthrough. It is victorious because I will never visit this problem again.
Please put this on your blog Pastor Travis,because this needs to be done.
I am so very sorry Jon that I could not see the forest through the trees. I knew and know how awesome you are,but was not actually seeing it all.It was just not absorbing. I did you wrong and I am very sorry for that. The change has occurred,I will never make those stupid mistakes I have made. I love you and am very proud of you.
I did not know just how right I was in saying I had to die to my son. It was me needing to die to being your mother, who tries to mother you. As I said last night your name means God's gift,but it does not say to who you are that gift. You were my gift,and now your Heidi's, along with all those you help.Again I am sorry, and I love you.
Thanks Pastor Travis for putting this up here. This needed to be put publicly.
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